While goal setting and establishing expectations can be motivating and inspiring and even necessary at times, setting goals can sometimes lead you to feel, well, shittier about yourself if you don’t reach the goals.
Mainly because, when we set a goal, we don’t always consider the actuality of the How and of What it takes to reach a particular goal.
The How and What includes more intangible yet realistic items such as our mindset and deeply held core-beliefes about ourselves that can either support us or limit us depending upon what they are.
The How and What also includes our general energy levels, the resources we have available to us and the daily ins and outs of managing our lives – what obligations we hold that impact choices we can and must make day to day.
So instead of setting goals as you dream of self-betterment, growth and achievement for the new year, I invite you to start by thinking about the end of the year.
And to think about the end of this new year from a qualitative perspective rather than a quantitative perspective. When we think about where we want to land with something, or end before we begin, we can find more potency in our approach at the start of it.
You can do this by considering the following questions:
- At this time next year, what would I like to be able to reflect back upon and be able to acknowledge as the most fulfilling moments, events, experiences and what can I do differently to create more space for those types of experiences?
- At this time next year, what would I like to feel most grateful for regarding the previous 12 months?
- What in my mindset, my core beliefs about myself and my day to day lifestyle would need to shift in order to reach #1 and #2 satisfactorily?
Engaging yourself qualitatively rather than quantitatively is not only a more humane way to approach yourself, but it can be more realistic and growth promoting.
Also, reflecting in this way, fuses the gift of self-appraisal offered by hindsight with the ability to plan ahead and inform a more honest and intentional approach to how you wish to spend the days that await you.
Do keep in mind though, that while there is much in life we have little control over, attending to and putting our energy to the aspects we can control – our mindset, energy and approach to ourselves, to others, to our lives, will better prepare us when we encounter those aspects that are out of our control.
