If you’re living in New York City, you likely know what it means to hustle. You might also know what it means to wake up at 3 a.m. with a racing heart and a brain that won’t shut off. On the outside, your life might look well put together—career milestones, a full social calendar, and even a sweet apartment—but inside, there’s a different story unfolding. This is what I often see in clients struggling with high-functioning anxiety.
What Is High-Functioning Anxiety?
While high-functioning anxiety isn’t an official diagnosis according to the DMS (Diagnostic Statistical Manual), it has become a commonly used phrase to note a very real experience – the quiet storm beneath the surface of the drive towards success.
The relentless pressure to perform, the overthinking, the inability to rest without guilt, the avoidance of being still with oneself long enough to actually know yourself. People who experience high-functioning anxiety often appear calm and capable, but they’re privately battling self-doubt, perfectionism, and an underlying fear of failure.
In a city like New York, where achievement is woven into the cultural fabric, it’s easy to miss the signs.
Signs You Might Be Dealing With High-Functioning Anxiety
- You’re constantly busy and uncomfortable with stillness
- You have trouble relaxing, even on vacation or weekends
- You replay conversations in your head, worrying about how you came across
- You’re driven by a fear of not being “enough”
- You accomplish a lot but rarely feel fully satisfied, or when you do its fleeting
- People describe you as “high-achieving” or “on top of it,” but inside, you feel exhausted and brittle
Does any of this sound familiar or resonate with you?
Why NYC Is a Breeding Ground for High-Functioning Anxiety
The pace of this city is exhilarating—and it can be exhausting. New York City is a locus of ambition, innovation, and creativity. The bar is set high here, and rest can feel like weakness. New York City feeds off momentum, and so do many of us.
Yet the hustle culture can be intense and wearing and coupled with constant sensory stimulation, and omnipresent social comparison, whether you subscribe to it or not, messaging exists all around to create the perfect storm for high-functioning anxiety.
In a city that rewards productivity and performance, there’s little room to slow down or ask for help. The pressure to achieve, combined with underlying isolation and overstimulation can fuel a quiet, internal struggle that often goes unnoticed—because on the outside, it just looks like success.
But success doesn’t have to come at the cost of your nervous system.
Experiential Psychotherapy for NYC Anxiety: An Holistic Approach to Healing
As an experiential psychotherapist, I work with clients not just through talk, but by helping them feel and process what’s stored in their bodies. Anxiety isn’t just in your thoughts—it’s in your shoulders, your breath, your gut and coursing through the cells of your body. It’s the tension you ignore because “there’s no time to deal with it” or you would just not rather face it.
Learning to explore what it’s like to pause, to notice, to listen can be daunting but life changing. To stop performing, even briefly, and get curious about what’s underneath the drive is key.
Healing isn’t about becoming less ambitious—it’s about becoming more attuned. When you can listen to your anxiety instead of running from it, you begin to uncover its purpose and loosen its grip.
You’re Not Alone—Even If It Feels That Way
High-functioning anxiety thrives in isolation. The myth is: “Everyone else has it figured out.” But I’ve sat with countless New Yorkers who whisper the same fear: “What if I’m really not okay?”
Here’s the truth—struggling doesn’t mean you’re failing. It means you’re human. And often, it’s our struggles that can lead us to be the best version of ourselves by showing us the places within that need our attention, thereby leading us to a deeper understanding about the truth of who we are.
And as one of my teachers would often say, “only the truth can set you free” even though the journey through it may be uncomfortable. To face our vulnerabilities takes courage, intention and support, and no one needs to do such work alone.
A New Kind of Success
Imagine success that includes rest. Achievement that’s not driven by fear. Relationships where you can exhale. It’s not just a fantasy—it’s possible. But it starts with slowing down long enough to notice what’s really going on beneath the surface.
If this resonates, I invite you to reach out at newclients@bhavatherapygroup.com Therapy doesn’t have to be a last resort. Sometimes, it’s just a safe space to take off the mask.
And in a city that never sleeps, that kind of space can be revolutionary.
REFERENCES:
Rosen, R. H. (2008). Just enough anxiety: The hidden driver of business success. Penguin.
Strack, J., Lopes, P., Esteves, F., & Fernandez-Berrocal, P. (2017). Must we suffer to succeed?. Journal of individual differences.
