The holiday season isn’t simply sparkle, glitz and wonder for all. It’s also a season that can stir a whirlwind of feelings, moods, pressures and expectations, financial stress and challenging family dynamics.
While the season can be a time of joy and connection, it can also be known to increase stress levels, induce overwhelm, and turn the volume up on painful feelings like loneliness and grief.
It is possible to avoid getting swept up in the tidal wave of emotions and stress the holidays can bring. This short guide of gentle practices, reminders and tips can help you find more ease and peace and less stress and pain this holiday season.
1. Focus on What Matters Most During the Holidays
The holidays are filled with “shoulds”—we should attend every gathering, we should feel happy, we should buy the perfect gifts. Take a moment to check in with yourself and ask: What do I actually want and need? Let yourself prioritize activities and traditions that feel truly meaningful for you and let go of those that feel more like obligations. Take a realistic appraisal of the calendar and your time and bring intentionality and truth to how you wish to spend the days ahead in a way that feels healthiest for you.
2. How to Set Health Boundaries During the Holidays
Whether it’s with family members, social obligations, or your own expectations, setting boundaries is essential to maintaining a sense of groundedness. Boundaries are an act of self-care, allowing you to protect your energy and emotional well-being.
Be compassionate but clear when communicating your needs and resist the urge to over-explain your reasoning for saying no. While it can be hard and disappointing for others to receive a “no”, remember, saying “no” to one thing is saying “yes” to time you may need to nourish your mental health which will serve you and everyone you encounter going forward.
3. Practice Present-Moment Awareness
The holidays can bring up memories from the past or concerns about the future, which can add to our anxiety and stress. Practicing mindfulness, even in the smallest of ways, can help ground and center you. Take a few moments intermittently throughout each day to pause, breathe deeply and slowly allowing you to connect with your breath and your body. Take note of the ground beneath your feet and try to name 1-3 things you feel most grateful for. These short but sweet practices will do wonders for your nervous system and your mental state and they do not have to take a great deal of time.
4. Allow Yourself to Feel What You Feel
The holiday season can evoke a wide range of emotions, from joy and gratitude to grief and sadness. If you’ve lost someone dear or if you’re feeling isolated, it’s okay to feel these emotions fully. Knowing that hard feelings may come up can help you better manage them when they emerge. Committing to honoring your experiences without judgment and giving yourself permission to feel whatever may arise is absolutely essential.
Implementing a mantra practice such as saying inwardly to yourself, “I can make space for and allow my feelings to be felt and move through me” or, “As hard feelings come, I can feel them and they will pass” is an important first step in energetically creating that allowance for yourself to feel, express, and honor the range of emotions that come up.
5. Adjust Your Focus in Realistic Ways
Where we put our focus shapes our experience. While loss, loneliness and pain are real and unavoidable experiences, and such feelings are healthy to feel, remember everything has a limit. When we constantly dwell on what’s missing, feelings of inadequacy or dissatisfaction intensify, which can cloud our perspective and drain our energy.
While allowing yourself to feel what you need to feel is essential, it is equally important to counterbalance such hard feelings and experiences with alternative practices that feed your heart, mind and soul. Gratitude exercises, physical exercise, listening to music, dancing, viewing or engaging in expressive arts, watching a comedic show or movie and volunteering are all ways to feed your nervous system with life promoting stimulation.
6. Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help During the Holidays Seek
Remember, self-care isn’t about going it alone. If you’re struggling, it’s okay to lean on friends, family, or mental health professionals. Sharing your feelings can lighten the load and offer a sense of connection. Sometimes, talking with someone who can listen with empathy and without judgment—whether a loved one or a therapist—can be deeply healing.
The holiday season is a time of giving, so why not give yourself the gift of self-compassion and care? By tuning into your needs, setting boundaries, and honoring your unique experiences, and implementing gentle and loving self-care practices, you can cultivate a season that feels nourishing and supportive to your well-being.
Reaching out for help may be easier than you think. Our team at Bhava Therapy is here to help you during the holidays and throughout the year.
Resources:
American Psychological Association. (2023, November 30). Even a joyous holiday season can cause stress for most Americans [Press release].
